| |
| |
|
Faith411.com - Inspirational |
|
|
|
Vital information and articles related to inspiration.Call To Action
Direct Answers - Column for the week of February 3, 2003 I need some advice, please! I've been married to the same man for 11 years. He's a nice person when he's not drinking. However that isn't very often. He drinks on a daily basis. Sometimes it's four beers, sometimes it's 12 or more. He drinks alone and then gets verbally abusive. He tells me I could never make it without him. I would have to live in a cardboard box. He calls me names, then tells me he loves me and will never let me leave. He had a terrible childhood. He was adopted and his dad left his mom for another woman. He hasn't gotten over his anger, but he won't seek any type of help. He denies there is a problem. My husband saves most of the good stuff for me, but he's verbally abusive to our two children as well. I've been to Al-Anon and talked to counselors. I tried to draw him back into the family, but he keeps pushing us away. I feel it's best to separate from him. Maybe the realization will make him take control. It's sad when your children wake up in the morning and ask, "Is Dad in a better mood, or do we need to be careful?" Esme Esme, your kids are living in a crazy, unpredictable environment. Walking on eggshells is affecting their development, and it will damage their future. Their emotions are cycling between fear, bewilderment, anger and embarrassment. Children raised in this environment often become people pleasers who judge themselves harshly and have a hard time following through on projects. They likely will have difficulty disclosing their feelings to others, and they likely will live with a constant feeling of dread. You have no power to change your husband's behavior. Only he can change it, and if he ever changes, he will do it for his own sake. Until he is tired of being controlled by anger and alcohol, he will not change. At present he can be abusive and drunk and still maintain his home and family. He has no incentive to change. There are no consequences for continuing as he is, and there is no reason to assume a separation will make him take control. If he changes, it may be long after you leave. Your highest duty is to your children. They have done nothing to deserve living in this kind of home. Your next duty is to yourself. You can't live a normal life with this man. There is one more duty. That is the duty your husband owes to himself not to waste his chance at life. But that is a duty only he can fulfill. Proceed with your decision to leave, and take steps to ensure your safety and that of your children. Wayne Sexual Histories I've been dating a lady for about a week. We really click. A few days ago we were talking about personal problems, and she told me she had herpes. I am in my 30s and have never met anyone with herpes. I was married for two years, but before I was married I was a virgin and very naïve about sexual things. I don't know if I should avoid sexual contact with her or just walk away. Manny Manny, you have a serious decision to make. Unless and until you see this lady as a life partner, avoid sexual contact. Otherwise, if things don't work out, her situation could become your own. We suggest sitting down with a physician or other health professional to discuss exactly what this can mean for your future. There is no reason to be embarrassed. Simply explain to them what you explained to us. The reason to go to a medical source first is you will not only get an authoritative answer, but you will have laid the groundwork for future treatment if you decide to proceed. Tamara About The Author Authors and columnists Wayne and Tamara Mitchell can be reached at www.WayneAndTamara.com. Send letters to: Direct Answers, PO Box 964, Springfield, MO 65801 or email: DirectAnswers@WayneAndTamara.com.
MORE RESOURCES:
Inspirational - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Martial Arts CHARACTER And the Universal Law of Interdependence - The Keys to Life Mastery, Key #2 In the philosophical teachings which form the foundation for the Ninja Warrior's lifeways, there is a principle known as the 'law of interdependence.' This so-called 'law' is not a must-do rule which one must follow, nor is it to be confused with dependence or co-dependence as it is seen today where one or more individuals who cannot or choose not to provide for themselves, lean on and 'depend' on the work and resources of another for the fulfillment of their needs. Living Profoundly When you realize that you really want to have an impact in this world, to make a difference, remember that it is in each moment that you are alive and in the present. When you are too busy worrying about what you don't have, what you have to do, where you've been, and what you don't have, you're not in the present; you're consumed by the past you can't change and the future that has yet to happen. The Eyes of the Clown There are few enough miracles in life, God knows. I think perhaps the circus is one of them. A Prison Planet I decreed my 'twin' into my life in early 1990. It is a story I tell in other books but I think even Edward House would have a hard time topping my gifts. Create Your Own Self Esteem - Part 1 Self-esteem is something that we all wish we had more of. Some of us go through our entire life feeling "self-esteem deficient". There Must Be A Way Out! He was pushing a cart containing crates of soft drinks and followed closely by his two little boys when their momentum was halted. Noticing the situation, I - who was on my way to see my printer's - stopped to see what would happen next. In Tall Grass My best friend, Ryan, told me last night he got his girlfriend, Rebecca, pregnant. He is 22 and she is 20. Shame and Guilt: A World of Difference Learning to distinguish between two powerful emotions - superficially very similar but in practice, very different - is essential not only for healthy self-esteem but for fulfilling interpersonal relationships.Jill and Sharon (not their real names) worked on the same projects in close proximity to each other in a relatively small office. Just Say, I Love You to Those Who are... Life is beautiful and lovable with the type of people we have around us. We talk about unconditional love, what is that? The way we love GOD?is unconditional love. Anam Cara - Finding a Song for the Heart All this week I have been singing.This week I have been dancing as well. I Dare You To Be Successful Just imagine how it would feel to be successful.. The Power of Inspiration INSPIRATION can be a powerful thing. It can keep you going when all around you cries out "quit!" It is even more powerful than motivation,as motivation gives you your basic reasons to keepgoing--it tells you why you want to do what you do, because motivation is based on goals. Heart Direct Answers - Column for the week of May 24, 2004I am the mother of a 6-year-old child. My husband is an alcoholic and refuses to realize it because he can skip a few days, once in awhile, before drinking again. Motivation and Inspiration: Illusions 101 Q: I was wondering if you could recommend any books on motivation and change that are fun to read and that aren't all rah rah, if you know what I mean. Could there even be such a thing as a book that's like a novel or short story that's about motivation?Your question is very well-timed. Each Moment Is To Be Treasured Let us grasp and treasure each precious moment of our lives. The previous moment is gone and the next is on its way. Dream Board DREAM IT, CREATE IT, BECOME ITIf you've been reading my newsletter for awhile, you know that I continue to incorporate and teach the 'how to' principles behind successfully achieving our goals and dreams. One important piece of wisdom I've gained is that nothing happens, no forward steps are taken until we first have a dream. Honesty Those who pride themselves on their honesty should also concern themselves with this principle: The effectiveness of honesty depends on a person's willingness to face the truth, which may conflict with this person's desires and provoke denial.In such a case, how can one promote this willingness, despite this conflict? The answer to this question could prove useful to anyone who seeks to be effectively honest with people in denial. Escape From the Dungeon: Jennifers Survival Story Have you ever been encountered with a trauma in life and not know how your life would be after it was all said and done? This is a story of my trauma and how I survived and how I am taking an extreme tragedy and turning it into something spectacular.This is a story of psychological terror brought on by the hands of my mother. Super Powers It is fun to watch movies of those with super powers. It sparks the imagination to watch their feats of great strength, lightening speed and great leaping ability. Thoughts Are Like Seeds - Are You Planting Flowers or Weeds? "You can't harvest what you don't sow. So plant your desires, gently nurture them and they will be rewarded with abundance.
|
|
Inspirational Articles Home Page | Inspirational Articles Site Map | News | Faith411.com Home Page EZmatic.com | IgoJo | UpBee | Blue Ryder | Health | ZippyGo | Ken J Wagner Faith411.com - all Vital information and articles related to Inspirational. |
| © 2006 |
